Tim has been preaching foundational grace-gospel for ten months straight now. It has brought, and is bringing, a revolution into the lives of those who have ears to hear.
He has, in the last ten months, touched on terms such as "rules" and "lists", and there were some few who took him literally, taking offense as if Tim was aiming his entire emphasis on the fact that they personally loved to make lists for themselves.
Little did they know that what was being preached was not all about "their" lists or "their" rules, actually. What was being taught wasn't about making lists in some literal, letter-of-the-law, Pharisaical sense.
(The Pharisees complained, "This man Jesus said 'Tear down the temple, and I will raise it up in three days!' " Those religious ones were forever misunderstanding Jesus' words, because they were open to being offended.)
Little did these few know (nor did they truly seek to understand) that the idea of "your list" or "my list"....whomever's "list"...actually dates back to Harvest Church messages from ten or more years ago. In a defining set of messages, the concept of "the list" was forever fixed in the minds of Harvest Church saints:
"And you, being dead in your trespasses and the uncircumcision of your flesh, He has made alive together with Him, having forgiven you all trespasses, having wiped out the handwriting of requirements (i.e. "THE LIST") that was against us, which was contrary to us. And He has taken it out of the way, having nailed it to the cross."
We learned, a decade ago, that we are to be imitators of God, and take our personal "lists" that we secretly hold over our relationships, and (in order to have sweet, continuous, right relationships) do the same thing to our personal lists that Christ did to "the" list: move it out of the way, and nail it to the cross.
The text was out of Colossians 2, and those messages became part of the DNA of a whole church. It saddens me, all the quiet, zealous but misguided lists we have, full of good-seeming personal preference ordinances, that get in the way of love and friendship.
This is where the term "the list" came from - any old-timer at Harvest will be able to explain that to you, if you care enough to ask them.
Having said that, I love to make lists. I live by them. I solidly believe that without a list, no one can be productive. I believe that an empty schedule equals an empty life, and a full schedule demands that we make lots of lists, because no one can keep all those details in his or her head. I have a list of potential Christmas gift ideas, lists of household chores, a grocery list, a phone list, lists of my lists, and a list called my "front-end list".
A "front end list" is a list of a zillion appealing things that I'd like to get done. Right now, this includes things like planting some pansies, painting a shelf, a few sewing projects, some new recipes I have not yet tried, and finishing my first watercolor painting. I keep a front-end list so as not to let myself get stuck and unhappy. When I begin to feel dull or peckish, I can pull out this list, and jump into a brand new happy project, big or small, and get the creative juices flowing instantly. Sometimes we don't need a nap, so much as we just need a new something to do.
I also have a few rules...personal rules. I don't hold you to them, I hold myself to them, as much as any flawed human being can hold herself accountable to her own unique, personalized standard. In this sense, "rules" and "lists" are not at all opposed to grace!
My rules?
1) Honor my father and my mother. Old fashioned stuff, timeless, Biblical, and necessary. We all have baggage where it concerns our parents, some more than others. But I have never...never...seen a man or woman lightly esteem their mother or father and wholly prosper. They may make money, but they don't prosper. A lack of honor towards parents, to hold parents up to criticism, is to ultimately hold all legitimate authority in light esteem, and you will become seriously self deceived in all things spiritual.
The eye that mocks his father, And scorns obedience to his mother, The ravens of the valley will pick it out, And the young eagles will eat it.
The light of the soul is the eyes...no honoring of parents equals no light, no understanding, no sure direction. I don't care how old you are, or (short of extreme abuse) what your parents have done, please consider finding ways to honor them. Love them. Include them in all the details of your life. You don't have to - you get to. One of my rules is that I honor my parents. (I happen to have incredible parents, but we had our share of dysfunctional moments early on. I was not an easy child to raise.) This rule has served me well, prospering me at every turn.
2) Value continuity. There is something to be said for the continuity of staying with the same traditions at Christmas, staying with the same spouse, staying with a best friend through thick and thin, staying with a morning or evening routine, staying with the same great perfume, staying with the same church....just staying in general. Sticking and staying. It alarms me deeply, how willing some people are to utterly destroy continuity in their lives.
Continuity is costly, but its rewards are comforting and profound. God created our souls to depend on continuity in some areas, not resorting to change for the sake of change. It is generally unhealthy to jump marriages, jobs, relationships, churches, or ships. Ride it out. Things always get better, and where else can you look back over years and years of memories, memories both good and bad, but from that place of faithful continuity?
Proverbs 24:21 "My son, respect the LORD and the leader; Do not associate with those given to change."
Putting confidence in a man or woman who does not value continuity ("an unfaithful man") is like having a bad tooth, or a foot out of joint, Proverbs says. When you most need that foot to work, or when you most need to chew that bite down, you will suddenly be in intense pain. It is most important for parents and leaders to value continuity. Sheep and children need to know that some things will never change - things like the love of a parent or shepherd.
3) Never own more than you can use, and can consistently care for. This is one I need to revisit, but it is a maxim I have lived by. I have gotten rid of as much "stuff" as I have bought or received. We have given away a car (it was old, but still a favorite of my husband's), truckloads of clothing and shoes, dishes, pots, pans, a puppy, school supplies, books, and to a lesser extent, money itself. (I could still use more money, but that is to be the lot in life of the wife of a pastor who isn't on television.) We typically don't re-sell it - we just give it.
I try not to own anything I don't know to be useful or believe to be beautiful. Ahem. Time to clean house again.
I live by a few more "yea, verilies", but this post is way too long now. Silly rules, some of them, but they define me, and they have been most healthy for my life, and have actually energized and enabled my growth in grace.
Never, ever keep some kinds of lists and rules. But always, always keep the right kinds of lists and rules. And know which kind your pastor is referring to, and if you don't know, ask him. That way you don't spend your time being unnecessarily offended.
Make sense?
Good Words From Other Places
WHEN I AM VILIFIED
Even though princes sit plotting against me, your servant will meditate on your statutes. Psalm 119:23
David had been slandered by Saul. He had been slandered even by his own sons. The true disciple who lives like Jesus will be vilified at some point during his life. Those who are most offended by the Gospel will be the ones who rise up to wage war against him with words. Fear fuels their energy; fear of the truth.
What can make this experience so painful and debilitating is who it is that vilifies. When the unfair criticism comes from someone I don't know, it's easier to shrug it off. When it comes from a well respected member of the community, it can feel debilitating. Jesus drew harsh words from religious leaders and heads of state. Their influence on the people was pervasive yet because He was grounded in His mission and lived in uninterrupted communication with His Father, He never lost His way because of it. Nor, it appears, did His disciples.
Even John the Baptist invited the hatred of Herod and his wife but that didn't dilute his message. He knew his own heart and he understood kingdom clashes.
To be the subject of scorn and not lose my way, I must have my head and heart in the scriptures. To be a successful Christian does not mean that I will always be popular and well thought of. In fact, just the opposite. I will be vilified.
Jesus prepared his disciples to be street smart. "The world hates me and they will hate you too," He said. I am a foreigner here and the alien's culture is at the very least, peculiar. For Jesus, living by the laws of the kingdom paved the road to Calvary.
~Christine Wyrtzen www.daughtersofpromise.org
Even though princes sit plotting against me, your servant will meditate on your statutes. Psalm 119:23
David had been slandered by Saul. He had been slandered even by his own sons. The true disciple who lives like Jesus will be vilified at some point during his life. Those who are most offended by the Gospel will be the ones who rise up to wage war against him with words. Fear fuels their energy; fear of the truth.
What can make this experience so painful and debilitating is who it is that vilifies. When the unfair criticism comes from someone I don't know, it's easier to shrug it off. When it comes from a well respected member of the community, it can feel debilitating. Jesus drew harsh words from religious leaders and heads of state. Their influence on the people was pervasive yet because He was grounded in His mission and lived in uninterrupted communication with His Father, He never lost His way because of it. Nor, it appears, did His disciples.
Even John the Baptist invited the hatred of Herod and his wife but that didn't dilute his message. He knew his own heart and he understood kingdom clashes.
To be the subject of scorn and not lose my way, I must have my head and heart in the scriptures. To be a successful Christian does not mean that I will always be popular and well thought of. In fact, just the opposite. I will be vilified.
Jesus prepared his disciples to be street smart. "The world hates me and they will hate you too," He said. I am a foreigner here and the alien's culture is at the very least, peculiar. For Jesus, living by the laws of the kingdom paved the road to Calvary.
~Christine Wyrtzen www.daughtersofpromise.org
You Can Fail a Test
The Scripture, both old covenant and new, is full of references to waging war and being tested, both of which imply you can lose, and you can fail. It is not at all antithetical to grace to come to a realization that you have either fought and lost, or been tested and failed. In fact, it is in the light of loss or failure that the grace of God will begin, maybe for the first time, to make sense to you!
Where can you wage war and lose? In the battle for the mind. When you choose to believe the lie of the enemy; when you choose to believe your own understanding - you lose. Please allow me to emphasize that, because the gravity of it needs to be grasped: You. Lose.
If the truth, and only the truth sets you free, then non-truth is precisely what puts you in bondage. There is no middle ground. I know believers who to this moment are in bondage to their own understanding. Renewing the mind is a life long process, but having the humility to own up to that is half the battle. (There's that word again....battle.) My old Sunday school teacher, Len Sisson, was dead-on when he taught all us teenagers about "the battleground of the mind."
Where can you be tested and fail? You can fail in holding unswervingly to the prophetic word of the Lord, through confirmed prophetically gifted brothers and sisters in the church, words publicly ministered, not "a voice in your head."
(I emphasize the prophetic word because, for the purposes of this blog entry, to hold unswervingly to Scripture is, to use an old geometry proof term, a "given". It is the prophetic word we often struggle with.)
There are times and seasons when God speaks a "now word" into our lives...a word of destiny, a word of hope, in short - a word of prophecy. Yes, we take these words and we hold them up to the bright light of Scripture, and make sure they do not violate God's character and nature. In that way, we do test prophetic words.
But ultimately, the prophetic word tests us. And tests imply that it is possible to fail.
Ps 105:19 Until the time that his word came to pass, The word of the LORD tested him.
There are things Tim and I have heard the Lord on - planting Harvest Church was one of them. We've also received direction from the Lord, clear prophetic direction, in other areas.
One thing you do not do is shrink back, once the word of the Lord comes. Never, never, never question "hath God said?" once you have committed yourself to what you knew to be the word of the Lord - to do that will set for you the mother of all traps. If you are in any level of spiritual leadership (a new covenant form of a "vow" - you bear a certain level of responsibility to and for others), that is a holy, precious calling, not to be entered into lightly, and you dare not lose faith in what God has said. You persevere.
I'm not being flippant with my term for Deity when I say, "By God, you stick and stay with it."
Pr 20:25 It is a snare for a man to devote rashly something as holy, And afterward to reconsider his vows.
Oh sure, circumstances will scream at you that you "missed it". People will act in ways that seem to contradict what God said. Your mind will attempt to assert its own understanding, and you will be sorely, sorely tempted to lean on it, because the word of the Lord (now a memory) does not feel as solid as it once felt to you.
Can I implore you? I will gladly be reduced to shameless begging if I must: don't shrink back from the prophetic word of the Lord. Paul told Timothy that it is by those very words he was to wage war. Once God speaks in this special way, that very word exists as your test.
I call to your memory Abraham, Joseph, David, Peter, Paul, John....all these and more who received a word that tested them, not them testing the word.
Even under grace, not everyone passes their test. Some do fail. Even then, if they but acknowledge that they didn't pass the test, they can be sooner rather than later healed and restored - in order to be tested once more. God will bring His word to them again - often the same word that tested them before - God will require that they return to it, as though it were the lost axe head, and recover it and labor with it.
To deny that we can be tested is to deny both the Scripture, and the prophetic word of the Lord.
Have you received a clear word, a few months or a few years ago, as to God's will and destiny for your life? That is the very word that has tested you.
Pass or fail?
In the battleground of the mind, your enemy's agenda is to convince you of his lies, and to get you leaning to your own understanding. Only the truth sets free, and only by truth can you wage war - not your opinion of the truth, but rather truth itself.
Win or lose?
A Typical Day - In Pictures
Actually, this is a typical half-day, in pictures.
Life is sweet these days, albeit busy and noisy. Temperatures here are dipping down into the 40's for the first time since early April...which means we Atchleys make some smokin' chili. We stop eating chili when springs starts, and we don't have it again until the the first evening that forecasted lows are predicted to be in the 40's. Our particular version of chili simmers on the stove even now. What is your family's favorite version of chili? I'm truly interested in hearing it!
Ordinary days are but encores of the miraculous. I can find a thousand things to be thankful for, in one typical, ordinary day. Knowing the grace of God, functioning in the revelation of the gift of righteousness, I cannot help but walk in newness of life!
Bocelli wakes me up, singing...
Coffee, tea, scones, and sausage for breakfast (my favorite meal of the day!)
Classes at home...
A nook, in my kitchen, where I read my cookbooks...
Set out the ingredients to make a home made apple pie...
The "baking drawer"...(that is whole nutmeg, in the little steel "pinch" cup)
Isaac, who is actually a good cook, made the apple pie all by himself!
The pie, assembled and almost ready to bake - waiting for the crumble topping.
Sarah, in her brother's room, getting a drum lesson. Cute!
Life is sweet these days, albeit busy and noisy. Temperatures here are dipping down into the 40's for the first time since early April...which means we Atchleys make some smokin' chili. We stop eating chili when springs starts, and we don't have it again until the the first evening that forecasted lows are predicted to be in the 40's. Our particular version of chili simmers on the stove even now. What is your family's favorite version of chili? I'm truly interested in hearing it!
Ordinary days are but encores of the miraculous. I can find a thousand things to be thankful for, in one typical, ordinary day. Knowing the grace of God, functioning in the revelation of the gift of righteousness, I cannot help but walk in newness of life!
Bocelli wakes me up, singing...
Coffee, tea, scones, and sausage for breakfast (my favorite meal of the day!)
Classes at home...
A nook, in my kitchen, where I read my cookbooks...
Set out the ingredients to make a home made apple pie...
The "baking drawer"...(that is whole nutmeg, in the little steel "pinch" cup)
Isaac, who is actually a good cook, made the apple pie all by himself!
The pie, assembled and almost ready to bake - waiting for the crumble topping.
Sarah, in her brother's room, getting a drum lesson. Cute!My Current Motto ~
Live in Such a Way as to Intrigue....
(to intrigue: to be challenging; disturbingly provocative.)
Yyyyyyyep. ::Big Barney Fife Sniff::
...I am living up to my current motto quite nicely these days.
"Practitioner of Contentment" ~ OR, "How Sheila Got Her Groove Back"
I guess if there were to be any initials after my name, it would be "PC" ~ Practitioner of Contentment.
There really is no other phrase that has so consistently, over decades, defined my essence. I am typically happy, and cannot abide the cynical person. When life hands me dirt, I'll make a mud mask and come out with a better complexion than ever. When life hands me lemons, I'll stick 'em in my bra. Ahem. (Nah...)
So you can imagine when, quite suddenly, in the past three years or so, I discovered in my own thinking all the dreaded cynicism I have always disliked in others. Upon a brief but very prayerful investigation, I had a massive revelation: I was a compensatory optimist.
Was.
Good for me, for all the mud masks and lemon enhancement. It was far better for me than giving into the pessimism that was forever sitting there, lurking and sulking in the corner of my soul, bound and gagged while I worked so very hard to compensate for its existence. But no one...no one...can compensate forever. At some point, things have to get painfully honest.
I first thought it was hormones. No...hormones only have the power to unmask a woman's inner demons. They bring just enough physical vulnerability to render you unable to hide what's really there. When, oh when, will we understand as His beautiful women, that this isn't a bad thing? We finally get to deal with our stuff - if we are wise.
I thought it was transition...an emptying nest, and all that. No. Transition happens.
I thought it was the stress of raising teenage boys. That was a red herring, for sure.
I had been working all these years to be optimistic, to compensate for that innate pessimist, sitting all tied up and fuming in her chair in the corner of my consciousness. Simple as that. And a pessimist's image of herself and her world is completely connected to her image of her God. My concept of God, with all my book learning, was off. All it took was an overwhelming dose of real life, and the influence of a few cynics, to reveal the weakness in my own understanding. That sulky pessimist wriggled out of her ropes, tore off the gag I'd so carefully kept on her mouth, and she got up out of her chair and wreaked havoc in my head.
I tried to ignore her. She wouldn't go away. I wrestled her to the floor, and put her in a headlock, but she never tapped out. I sent her back to her chair, and quoted Scripture at her, but still she was there...larger than life.
She represented a belief structure. She is what I thought about God. "See, God has this low-level frustration towards you", she would say. And I'd send her back to her chair, and put the gag back on her. She'd always get loose, now and then. When others would testify in church of the work of God in their life, she'd sniff, "Wonder how long that'll last??" I'd stuff a lemon down her throat to shut her up. When I'd get caught up in wonder at anything, when my faith would begin to take flight, she was quick to pull the wings off the butterfly, and remind me of all things Real.
Worms. Never. Change.
She assured me that when I sinned, I was opening up myself to all sorts of Bad Things - nevermind the finished work of Christ. She swore that when I behaved, and only when I behaved, I was in His favor. She implied that it all depended on me, and how well I could compensate for my flaws. She withdrew from anyone and anything that challenged her control.
She smiled primly, all tied up in her chair, when I chose all the Right Things. She flexed her firm muscles in high self esteem when I jogged, did all my crunches, and ate organic food. She whispered to me that my body is a temple, after all. She particularly enjoyed it when I studied the doctrines of grace from her perspective. Man, did she know her Bible. Problem was, every time she showed me a passage, every time she quoted a verse, she was wearing this silly veil on her head. Consequently, in seeing I didn't perceive, and for all my hearing I didn't understand.
This arrangement worked for a very long time. Until I became too weary to compensate for her existence, and too tired to always be fighting with her, repeatedly returning her to the chair in the corner of my mind. It was either kill her or let her reign, with all her cynicism and unbelief.
I am happy to say that the word of God is alive and powerful, and sharper than any sword. It is able to divide and discern, and it discerned me. It discerned me openly. All things were suddenly naked and open in the eyes of Him with Whom I had to do.
And it was....allright. God....loves me. He turned His back on Christ at the cross so that I could look straight into His glory all the days of my life. Jesus bore my sins, He carried my sickness, and the punishment to obtain my peace was all...all...upon Jesus.
That chair, in the corner of my consciousness? Empty. That innate pessimist? Gone.
I'm yet a Practitioner of Contentment. I'm still making mud masks and playing with lemons. The only difference is that I'm not compensating for anything anymore. I am what and who I am, and "by the grace of God I am what I am, and His grace to me is not in vain."
Stella got her groove back one way, Sheila got her groove back by grace through faith.
There really is no other phrase that has so consistently, over decades, defined my essence. I am typically happy, and cannot abide the cynical person. When life hands me dirt, I'll make a mud mask and come out with a better complexion than ever. When life hands me lemons, I'll stick 'em in my bra. Ahem. (Nah...)
So you can imagine when, quite suddenly, in the past three years or so, I discovered in my own thinking all the dreaded cynicism I have always disliked in others. Upon a brief but very prayerful investigation, I had a massive revelation: I was a compensatory optimist.
Was.
Good for me, for all the mud masks and lemon enhancement. It was far better for me than giving into the pessimism that was forever sitting there, lurking and sulking in the corner of my soul, bound and gagged while I worked so very hard to compensate for its existence. But no one...no one...can compensate forever. At some point, things have to get painfully honest.
I first thought it was hormones. No...hormones only have the power to unmask a woman's inner demons. They bring just enough physical vulnerability to render you unable to hide what's really there. When, oh when, will we understand as His beautiful women, that this isn't a bad thing? We finally get to deal with our stuff - if we are wise.
I thought it was transition...an emptying nest, and all that. No. Transition happens.
I thought it was the stress of raising teenage boys. That was a red herring, for sure.
I had been working all these years to be optimistic, to compensate for that innate pessimist, sitting all tied up and fuming in her chair in the corner of my consciousness. Simple as that. And a pessimist's image of herself and her world is completely connected to her image of her God. My concept of God, with all my book learning, was off. All it took was an overwhelming dose of real life, and the influence of a few cynics, to reveal the weakness in my own understanding. That sulky pessimist wriggled out of her ropes, tore off the gag I'd so carefully kept on her mouth, and she got up out of her chair and wreaked havoc in my head.
I tried to ignore her. She wouldn't go away. I wrestled her to the floor, and put her in a headlock, but she never tapped out. I sent her back to her chair, and quoted Scripture at her, but still she was there...larger than life.
She represented a belief structure. She is what I thought about God. "See, God has this low-level frustration towards you", she would say. And I'd send her back to her chair, and put the gag back on her. She'd always get loose, now and then. When others would testify in church of the work of God in their life, she'd sniff, "Wonder how long that'll last??" I'd stuff a lemon down her throat to shut her up. When I'd get caught up in wonder at anything, when my faith would begin to take flight, she was quick to pull the wings off the butterfly, and remind me of all things Real.
Worms. Never. Change.
She assured me that when I sinned, I was opening up myself to all sorts of Bad Things - nevermind the finished work of Christ. She swore that when I behaved, and only when I behaved, I was in His favor. She implied that it all depended on me, and how well I could compensate for my flaws. She withdrew from anyone and anything that challenged her control.
She smiled primly, all tied up in her chair, when I chose all the Right Things. She flexed her firm muscles in high self esteem when I jogged, did all my crunches, and ate organic food. She whispered to me that my body is a temple, after all. She particularly enjoyed it when I studied the doctrines of grace from her perspective. Man, did she know her Bible. Problem was, every time she showed me a passage, every time she quoted a verse, she was wearing this silly veil on her head. Consequently, in seeing I didn't perceive, and for all my hearing I didn't understand.
This arrangement worked for a very long time. Until I became too weary to compensate for her existence, and too tired to always be fighting with her, repeatedly returning her to the chair in the corner of my mind. It was either kill her or let her reign, with all her cynicism and unbelief.
I am happy to say that the word of God is alive and powerful, and sharper than any sword. It is able to divide and discern, and it discerned me. It discerned me openly. All things were suddenly naked and open in the eyes of Him with Whom I had to do.
And it was....allright. God....loves me. He turned His back on Christ at the cross so that I could look straight into His glory all the days of my life. Jesus bore my sins, He carried my sickness, and the punishment to obtain my peace was all...all...upon Jesus.
That chair, in the corner of my consciousness? Empty. That innate pessimist? Gone.
I'm yet a Practitioner of Contentment. I'm still making mud masks and playing with lemons. The only difference is that I'm not compensating for anything anymore. I am what and who I am, and "by the grace of God I am what I am, and His grace to me is not in vain."
Stella got her groove back one way, Sheila got her groove back by grace through faith.
I Sing, Because I'm Happy!
There is no denying...we serve a "happy God". I want you to take a deep breath, right now. Let your neck and shoulders relax. Your God is in a good mood.
Most of us know what it feels like to be in a somewhat manipulative relationship. There are people who try to use their emotions to control the emotional atmosphere of others. Have you ever known someone who, if they feel unhappy, they seem to radiate a soul-curdling negativity into the very air around them? I'm able to overlook this in anyone once in awhile...we all become hurt or angry now and then, and sometimes we simply can't hide our heartbreak, or un-invite a guest who happens to be arriving at a bad time. But when I encounter someone who, time and again, shrouds the people around her with her own gray, depressive cloak...well, I know I have encountered someone who does not understand the grace of God.
I'm one who is very sensitive to the spiritual condition of others. I can detect the emotional "temperature" of a room and of a person, usually within moments. In the past I have unwisely accepted the responsibility for it. If there was tension in a room full of people, I felt responsible to say something funny to deflect it. If someone felt angry or depressed, I took up the job of improving their mood. This is fine, as I said, once in awhile. It is part of our ministry, one to another, in the body of Christ.
But now if, more than a few times, I walk in a door, or get around someone, and sense manipulative despair....I have no option but to speak of the gospel of the grace of God with that person. I can be patient for as long as necessary, if the gospel is willingly heard, received, and the dear one takes it and applies it not just to her destiny, but to her day. I will walk with her, because I understand that some things are a long process...renewing the mind with the good news of the grace of God in Christ Jesus is absolutely a process, and no one can skip it or short circuit it.
But if the good news of grace is not received, if it is in fact rejected (some reject it, if you can believe it!) I am bound to ignore the manipulation from that point on. I will not wear any one's shroud. I will not have my soul infected by any one's need, consciously or unconsciously, to have emotional power over others. I have spent far too long dealing with symptoms that were in fact not my own, but that of the sickness of another. No more. It is great to be discerning and sensitive and walk with others in their pain, if one is also wise and walking with prepared feet, ready to share good news. I hope to become wiser as I get older.
This is why it is so comforting and empowering and utterly blessed to be a friend of God. I am telling you, He is always in a good mood - always confident that what He has promised or begun, He is able to perform and complete. I come into His presence, and unlike a friendship with an emotionally controlling person, I leave with a full heart-tank. His good mood rubs off on me every time. There are such pleasures and rivers of joy that come with just being with the Lord. I long, with every part of me, to be a carrier of Him. I want Christ in me to minister to you, so that when you are around me, if you can at all receive grace, you feel hopeful and happy, filled and whole.
How do I know that an emotionally unstable and manipulative person needs grace? Because grace says I have been given the gift of righteousness, and the Scripture is clear:
The work of righteousness will be peace, And the effect of righteousness, quietness and assurance forever. (Is. 32)
The gospel of grace gives me a hope that is an anchor to my soul, keeping me from being blown about by every wind of doctrine. Emotions that run all over the map are a sure indication that somewhere I am not submitting my reality to the reality of the finished work of Christ. (We all experience being a bit blown about...we just don't all impart our unbelief and negativity to those around us, hindering their appropriation of the power of God unto salvation that is available only to those who believe.)
Relax, dear one. God has been in a good mood for a long time, and His equilibrium is unaffected by your issues. What a friend...consistent and faithful and full of grace!
Most of us know what it feels like to be in a somewhat manipulative relationship. There are people who try to use their emotions to control the emotional atmosphere of others. Have you ever known someone who, if they feel unhappy, they seem to radiate a soul-curdling negativity into the very air around them? I'm able to overlook this in anyone once in awhile...we all become hurt or angry now and then, and sometimes we simply can't hide our heartbreak, or un-invite a guest who happens to be arriving at a bad time. But when I encounter someone who, time and again, shrouds the people around her with her own gray, depressive cloak...well, I know I have encountered someone who does not understand the grace of God.
I'm one who is very sensitive to the spiritual condition of others. I can detect the emotional "temperature" of a room and of a person, usually within moments. In the past I have unwisely accepted the responsibility for it. If there was tension in a room full of people, I felt responsible to say something funny to deflect it. If someone felt angry or depressed, I took up the job of improving their mood. This is fine, as I said, once in awhile. It is part of our ministry, one to another, in the body of Christ.
But now if, more than a few times, I walk in a door, or get around someone, and sense manipulative despair....I have no option but to speak of the gospel of the grace of God with that person. I can be patient for as long as necessary, if the gospel is willingly heard, received, and the dear one takes it and applies it not just to her destiny, but to her day. I will walk with her, because I understand that some things are a long process...renewing the mind with the good news of the grace of God in Christ Jesus is absolutely a process, and no one can skip it or short circuit it.
But if the good news of grace is not received, if it is in fact rejected (some reject it, if you can believe it!) I am bound to ignore the manipulation from that point on. I will not wear any one's shroud. I will not have my soul infected by any one's need, consciously or unconsciously, to have emotional power over others. I have spent far too long dealing with symptoms that were in fact not my own, but that of the sickness of another. No more. It is great to be discerning and sensitive and walk with others in their pain, if one is also wise and walking with prepared feet, ready to share good news. I hope to become wiser as I get older.
This is why it is so comforting and empowering and utterly blessed to be a friend of God. I am telling you, He is always in a good mood - always confident that what He has promised or begun, He is able to perform and complete. I come into His presence, and unlike a friendship with an emotionally controlling person, I leave with a full heart-tank. His good mood rubs off on me every time. There are such pleasures and rivers of joy that come with just being with the Lord. I long, with every part of me, to be a carrier of Him. I want Christ in me to minister to you, so that when you are around me, if you can at all receive grace, you feel hopeful and happy, filled and whole.
How do I know that an emotionally unstable and manipulative person needs grace? Because grace says I have been given the gift of righteousness, and the Scripture is clear:
The work of righteousness will be peace, And the effect of righteousness, quietness and assurance forever. (Is. 32)
The gospel of grace gives me a hope that is an anchor to my soul, keeping me from being blown about by every wind of doctrine. Emotions that run all over the map are a sure indication that somewhere I am not submitting my reality to the reality of the finished work of Christ. (We all experience being a bit blown about...we just don't all impart our unbelief and negativity to those around us, hindering their appropriation of the power of God unto salvation that is available only to those who believe.)
Relax, dear one. God has been in a good mood for a long time, and His equilibrium is unaffected by your issues. What a friend...consistent and faithful and full of grace!
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