Sneeze, Re-attach, Repeat
Suddenly, out of nowhere, I have been sneezing my butt off today. All over town. In Wal-Mart, it was:
sneeze, reattach butt, repeat.
In the grocery store: sneeze, reattach, repeat. In the hardware store - well, you get the idea.
sneeze, reattach, repeat.
I'm so tired of the whole routine. If it weren't for dark chocolate and swearing, I might have a nervous breakdown after the week I've had.
Besides. Wine makes me sleepy which makes me grumpy if it is not time to sleep. So all I am left with is dark chocolate and swearing, which keeps me from being irritable with my family.
The way I look at it, every bite of dark chocolate, every mild swear word, is an act of selfless love for the people I live with. Maybe I should tweak my routine to "sneeze, swear, reattach, eat chocolate, repeat".
Nah. Too much trouble. And within three days, my butt would get so big, I couldn't pick it back up. I swear (::cough::), the next time I sneeze, I am just gonna look furtively, all around, and just leave my butt wherever it lies.
If I could only manage to sneeze and hold onto my butt at the same time. Alas, my motor skills are not like everyone else's.